November 2005

Iceland has a new 24-hour news channel, like a CNN or Sky type thing. It’s called, prosaically enough, The New News Channel*.

So why would a nation with a population of fewer than 300,000 need a 24-hour news channel? Precisely. Yet, there it is, broadcasting around the clock, with one of those moving banners at the bottom, announcing ‘breaking news’ as they happen. And therein lies the hilarity. Because, let’s face it, how much ‘breaking news’ can a nation of 300,000 actually deliver up in one day?

Which is why the weekly Spaugstofan, which throughout the winter parodies the week’s events in a half-hour programme every Saturday, did a send-up of the new[s] channel last weekend. During the programme, they kept having to ‘interrupt’ their regular programming for some super-important bit of news, which usually consisted of someone standing somewhere with a microphone, waiting for something to happen and looking really stupid. Meanwhile, they had this hand-operated banner at the bottom, with the ‘breaking news’ moving along, to wit: ‘Milkman sneezes’, ‘Stinky feet a nuisance’, ‘Chicken pieces getting larger’, ‘Walked into pole’, Toilet flushed’, ‘Rats chew through cable‘ etc. etc. In between there would be the weather news: A supremely dull-looking weatherman would appear with ‘Breaking Weather News’ that went something like: ‘A cloud has appeared to block the sun in the west end of Reykjavík. Let’s see this on the map… [map appears]… Yes, it’s precisely from Hofsvallagata 25 to… [listens to ear piece] … What? Oh. Correction: the sun only looked like it would go behind the cloud. In the end it changed direction…” Etc.

I don’t know; maybe you had to be there, but EPI and I were in stitches. Just goes to show: the funniest stuff is always the true stuff.

AND THE BREAKING WEATHER IS:
Ohhh my God, it was soooo dull today. It was majorly majorly overcast which means that daylight hardly managed to perforate the sky so the whole day passed by in a sort of semi-haze. Daylight simulator lamp, please! Why have I not yet gone out and bought one of those muthas?? A: because every time the sun appears I think, oh this ain’t so bad, and anyway Rozanne told me that her simulator lamp did zilch for her, so why spend the money? [A very persuasive argument it is, too. As seen by the fact that I convince myself every time.] Temps are 3°C and sunrise was at… ach, it doesn’t matter, it might as well have stayed un-risen. Boo.

* That’s Nýja fréttastöðin in the vernacular.

First Sunday in advent today.

Here in Iceland, advent marks the start of the Christmas season and in practice means that you can officially begin putting up your decorations. Some people cannot wait for this day, particularly those who hate the winter darkness and live for the day that they can start putting advent lights in their windows…

[You will see a variation of these in at least one window of virtually every Icelandic home during advent…]

Or just coloured string lights, gathered together like this…

… or set out in some other way; bunched inside glass vases, wrapped around objects, stuck on window panes, laid out in window sills, thrown over mirrors… in short, anywhere you can possibly think of putting them. [Good thing there are plenty of natural sources of power in this country, otherwise we’d probably need a separate nuclear power plant just for advent.]

AND AS PER OUR PERSONAL TRADITION…
EPI and I and our collective brood of four - all except one, who had to work - got together today to make Christmas cards. We’ve done this a few years in a row and it’s become an indispensable part of Christmas. We have such fun, start around 2 or 3 in the afternoon, and completely lose all track of time. There’s such great satisfaction in losing yourself in creativity and just talking about everything and nothing. Here’s what the table looked like in the middle of the afternoon…

However, that colossal mess did yield some excellent results, if I do say so myself.

Later, in the evening, we had our very first traditional Icelandic Christmas dinner: Smoked lamb, potatoes in white sauce, green peas and pickled red cabbage, and the piece de resistance - laufabrauð, a traditional Icelandic paper thin bread that is deep-fried and eaten with butter. So good. When I say ‘traditional’, I mean just that - it’s usually not what people have for Christmas dinner any more, but for most people it is a throwback to days past and a necessary part of the Christmas season, at least once, to eat smoked lamb - hangikjöt - and laufabrauð.

IT WAS A GORGEOUS DAY WEATHER-WISE, TOO…
YT headed out for a brisk walk around the golf course before all the action got underway. It was a magnificent day, the sun was blindingly brilliant and temps just above freezing, and the area out there was packed with people enjoying the day. Everybody was in such a fantastic mood - smiling and saying hello. Would you like to see one more picture? Taken directly into the sun? [It looks dark but it isn’t, it’s just because the camera can’t handle the brilliance, so it had to squint…] This is about as high as the sun rises in the sky these days - then it starts to go down again. This was at around 1.30pm.

… Oh, maybe just one more. Taken in the other direction, of Mt. Esja in the distance…

Current temps 0°C and sunrise was at 10.34, sunset at 15.56. Happy advent!

Sometimes EPI and I have the best time vegging on the couch and acting all appalled at some of the TV fodder we’re served up, particularly some of the idiotic reality TV shows coming out of the US.* Like tonight, when we landed on yet another thrilling episode of Cheaters.

For those that don’t know, Cheaters is a reality show in which people who suspect their partner is being unfaithful contact Cheaters’ “licenced investigators” in order to “exercise [their] right to be informed”. The investigators then follow the offending party around, take copious amounts of photos and/or hide cameras in bedrooms, etc. with the purpose of exposing the cheating partner. It all ends with a huge confrontation in which the participants display their most base and grotesque behavior. The whole nasty business is moderated by some holier-than-thou host who pontificates like crazy in a Jerry Springer-esque type of way. It’s completely revolting - and completely engrossing. I’m sorry to say.

ANYWAY!
EPI had this excellent idea tonight. We would connive a plan in which YT would contact Cheaters to follow EPI around because he was cheating, the bastard. I’d make up a tearful story and manipulate them stupid [not difficult] and in the end they would feel so sorry for me that they’d be losing sleep and would not be able to think of anything else. Anyway, they’d then follow EPI and ‘the other woman’ with their night-vision cameras into a park somewhere. Thinking they were home free they would move in for the kill but would see an astonishing sight: EPI and the other woman humping the trees. [Note: Not in the trees, but humping the trees.] EPI and the other woman would then sit down and they’d have some dried cod’s heads and would make the cod’s heads do the kissing, i.e. EPI would kiss a dried cod’s head on the mouth and then pass it to the other woman and she’d kiss the dried cod’s head on the mouth, and then pass hers to EPI’s for kissing, and so on, ad infinitum. And YT would barge in and start screaming at EPI and would call the other woman a f***ing slut and throw the cod’s heads all around, and the Cheaters’ team would never have seen anything like it and would deliver a special watershed episode on Cheaters with this totally perverted type of cheating going on.

[I swear, EPI was not on anything stronger than two glasses of red wine and a bowl of Ben and Jerry’s when he hatched this magnificent plan.]

OH BUT YT IS HIGH ON THE WEATHER
Plus really really really tired [and so easily entertained]. Worked mega-intensively today and didn’t finish until 8pm. The weather was cold and bright and filled with small-particle dust this morning, just like yesterday. But later, when I came out of the place I was working, it was raining. Somehow between then and then, temps rose and it started to precipitate on all the dust. Phew. At the moment we have temps of ° according to mbl.is [insert what you like I guess] and sunrise was at 10.28, sunset at 16.01. Only 27 more days until the winter solstice, whoo-hoo!

* To be fair, some of the very best TV programmes come out of the US, too: The Sopranos, Six Feet Under, ER - three of my absolute favourites.

I read an interesting quote this evening. One of those ‘Aha!’ quotes that just hits you in the solar plexus for being absolutely true. It was in an interview with a foreign national living here in Iceland, and he was asked what it was that he liked most about it. His response was that he liked the fact that Iceland is a small society and that the Icelanders push you to go to the top. They want to see you do your best here.

I had never thought about it in quite that way, but I agree with him. You can do anything in Iceland. Figure out what you want to do, then go do it. It’s easy - there’s hardly any red tape, people make decisions quickly, they’re easily infected with enthusiasm, and you will always know someone who knows someone who can pull a string or two to get you what you need. [Within limits, of course.] There’s always a way to do what you want to do. I think Icelanders really understand that.

Take for instance the incredible amount of cultural activity here. People getting together to make music, or performance art, or theatre, or dance, or writing books, or poetry, or whatever. Two Christmases ago, for instance, a relatively well-known writer who happens to live in my area was a common sight outside the local supermarkets and corner stores, selling her latest book of poetry. And by no means was it some cheaply-produced tome; it was gorgeous, printed on heavy glossy paper, with a bright fuischa cover, and totally modern design. And exquisite content.

EPI and I stopped to chat with her one evening, while we bought a copy. She preferred self-publishing, she said. That way she could pick her own paper and choose her own layout and pocket the profits herself. So you stand outside some stores in December; no big deal. And anyway, it afforded great opportunity for conversation.

Things are hardly ever a problem in Iceland. The natives are generally a laid-back bunch; one of their stock phrases [normally uttered with a careless shrugging of the shoulders] is þetta reddast! - which loosely translated means ‘ it will all work out in one way or another’. As good a philosophy as any, I guess, used in moderation.

And as for insisting on doing your best - I couldn’t begin to seek socio-analytical answers to that one, but I know it’s true. Which is perhaps why Icelanders, despite coming from a nation of merely 300,000, are so visible in the international arena. Because they’re used to doing their best and just going for it.

BUT DOES THE WEATHER PUSH THEM TO THE TOP?
Don’t know about that, but I do know it’s cold and dark right now. Today temps dipped to below freezing and the sun appeared. Which was a relief - seeing the sun, I mean - but it brought another rather grave problem: when the weather is cold and dry in the winter, the small particle pollution is a killer. Driving along Miklubraut today [one of the main arteries] was almost like driving in a desert storm - a cloud of dust hung in the air to the point of making visibility blurry some distance ahead. I kid you not. They have discussions every year about the studded-tire problem [which tears up the asphalt and causes the pollution] and they are banned after a certain point in the spring, but the sad fact is that there are a few days each year where they are absolutly essential. Not to mention for those who drive outside the city where the road conditions tend to be very treacherous in winter. Anyway. Gas mask needed today for pedestrians along Miklubraut. Ugh. Current temps -1°C and sunrise was at 10.25, sunset at 16.03. Oh, and HAPPY THANKSGIVING to all my US visitors!

Right. Since you’ve all been such good sports, I reckon a few words of elaboration on my 10 truths are in order. [Even though each and every one of these could easily be turned into a whole book.]

1. I owned my first property by the time I was eight.

… And no, contrary to what Bromman suggests in yesterday’s comment thread, it had nothing to do with Monopoly. My mother and father split when I was five years old. They owned a condominium [… with a mortgage] and when they divorced – when I was seven – they gave it to me.

2. I started living on my own when I was 16.

I was far too young. But out of two unappealing options, it was the one I preferred.

3. My first boyfriend did time in prison while we were still together.

I was a pretty fragmented Young Person and let’s just say I sought refuge in a lot of insanity. And I must say this: I’m so happy that I managed to get my shit together enough to not have to pass all that madness on to my daughter. [Because that’s what happens. The next generation gets the insanity – with interest – unless you do something.] When I compare her to myself at her age I could weep with gratitude.

4. I once worked in a restaurant owned by Dan Ackroyd.

It was called Crook’s and it was on Front Street in Toronto. It was a good bar to work in, as bars go. A cursory google search reveals that it no longer exists.

5. I used to live in the next apartment to an erotic phone business.

This was hilarious. It was when phone sex businesses were just starting up in the 80s and I lived above a flower shop on Parliament Street in Toronto. There were three apartments in the corridor and the walls were paper-thin. The front apartment was vacated and somebody new moved in. Then the phone started ringing. It rang off the wall, day and night [picture if you will a supremely irate YT lying in bed trying to sleep] and weird men started hanging around the front door, asking for ‘the mailbox for Apartment 1’. It was only by fluke that I learned the truth. A friend and I called the number because we couldn’t believe it – but there it was. I learned all about phone sex procedure through that experience [not first-hand, though, I hasten to add].

6. I studied acting at one of the top theatre schools in Canada.

Ryerson Theatre School in Toronto. It’s in the top five. Around 650 people auditioned and 34 got in.

7. I have a mixed race child.

AAH’s father is African-American.

8. I was once the victim of a purse snatching on the London Underground.

‘7-9-13’ as the Icelanders would say [‘touch wood’].

9. I dropped out of university four times.

This one warrants its own separate post.

10. I once took both Ian McEwan and Graham Swift here.

… And they were real troupers, too. Sat in the sauna for a good long while and even ran out to immerse themselves in the icy cold lake like true Vikings. We had a blast.

11. I spoke Greek as a child.

I lived in Cyprus [the Greek part – duh!] for a year-and-a-half when I was little [5-7 years old]. I had a friend in the next house who was Greek Cypriot and after hanging around with her daily for a few months I’d pretty much picked up the essentials. Last summer I returned to Cyprus for the first time since and took AAH with me. I was determined to find our old house. It turned out to be occupied by an all-male gambling club [a story unto itself] and astonishingly, incredibly, my friend still lived next door and she was just coming out of her house while we were there looking around. We had this incredible reunion and after all this time we’re in email contact now. It was pretty amazing.

… AND JUST BRIEFLY: THE WEATHER
Extremely WINDY at the moment, so yuck. It could be worse, though – it could be colder. Like it’s set to be tomorrow. Current temps are right at the freezing mark. Sunrise was at 10.22 and sunset at 16.06. [Apologies that the formatting is all screwy. It seems to have a mind of its own]

THANK YOU everyone for humoring me! As you can see, it doesn’t take a lot for me to be amused. And contrary to what you may think I haven’t been holding out on you on purpose - I have a really packed schedule at the moment and haven’t had a chance to get online before now.

I’m delighted with all your guesses. A lot of them have given me food for thought and/or blog posts. And amazingly, the one false fact was one that only one person guessed. And no, it wasn’t number one.

It was number eight. I have never been the victim of a purse snatching on the London Underground. [Touch wood.] Well done JB!

The rest are all true.

BUT YOU’RE ONLY INTERESTED IN THE WEATHER, RIGHT?
And it’s quite lovely at the moment, too, a cold northern sun shining on the city, the ground all wet and the air clear and fresh. Mt. Esja across the bay all white with snow. Temps are currently 3°C and sunrise was at 10.19 [yikes!] and sunset is due for 16.08.

Almost 130 visitors to my website so far today and only nine - nine! - who have attempted to answer The Question.

[Special props to Teri, who has attempted twice. What a trouper.]

I’ve always marvelled at those ‘100 Things About Me’ lists that people post on their websites. Primarily because I always think I could never find 100 things about myself that other people would find very interesting. Or even 50 things. Even 20 would be pushing it.

However, I do reckon I can come up with 10 interesting /shocking /amazing /marvellous facts about myself that might be of interest. And here’s the deal: I saw a cool twist on the ‘100 things’ idea over at Denise’s blog a while back. It’s like this: I post a bunch of things about myself that are true, and one that is false. And it’s up to you to figure out which one is false.

So here goes. I give you ten truths, and one untruth. Ten points - no, eleven! - goes to anyone who figures out which one is a lie.*

1. I owned my first property by the time I was eight.
2. I started living on my own when I was 16.
3. My first boyfriend did time in prison while we were still together.
4. I once worked in a restaurant owned by Dan Ackroyd.
5. I used to live in the next apartment to an erotic phone business.
6. I studied acting at one of the top theatre schools in Canada.
7. I have a mixed race child.
8. I was once the victim of a purse snatching on the London Underground.
9. I dropped out of university four times.
10. I once took both Ian McEwan and Graham Swift here.
11. I spoke Greek as a child.

Your votes please!

AND TODAY’S WEATHER WAS…
Very overcast and very gray, but I didn’t mind because it was kind of dramatic, as opposed to just - dull. For instance. When I went out for my run earlier along the seashore, there was a very heavy tide and while everything was gray - the sky, the ocean, the paved cycle path along the shore, the rocks… the waves had gorgeous white caps on them and off in the mist there was a fishing vessel sailing in to shore with all its lights on. It was like a painting. Plus it was mild and gorgeous running weather as there was hardly any wind. Not for long though, as a storm has been registered on the charts. Temps are currently 3°C and sunrise was at 10.16 and sunset at 16.11. Oh: famous people alert! Meg and Jack from the White Stripes. Gave a concert here in our very own Smoky Bay** this evening.

* Those of you who know me well are automatically disqualified!
** What Reykjavík really means. Reykur = smoke. Vík = bay.

AAH has gone off on a trip with the local community centre. They went here. [Lucky girl]. She went armed with a large bag of candy, designed to provide enough of a sugar high to keep her and her girlfriends up all night. At least that was the plan. Because they’d heard through the grapevine that the boys were planning to invade their sleeping quarters and pour syrup into their hair in the middle of the night. And as everyone knows, being 14 and having a head full of syrup is the worst thing imaginable.

I’m consistently impressed with this whole community centre involvement here in Iceland. When I was growing up [in Canada] the mere mention of the term ‘community centre’ conjured up images of a lifeless and stale building with less-than-adequate heating and totally boring activities like old ladies wearing polyester and playing checkers. Places where, for some reason, everything seemed forced.

Certainly the community centres I knew then didn’t serve the same function as they do here, which is largely to provide a venue for adolescents to meet after school and in the evenings. Kids can go there and play pool or air hockey or just hang out and listen to music. And every evening there is a different activity planned: dances, ‘wool-sock football matches’, ‘cafe evening’, ‘cosy evening’, rap evenings, or getting together to watch something on TV, like the finals in the Icelandic IDOL competiton or similar.

What’s particularly excellent about this from my perspective as a parent is that these places really help keep the kids off the streets. They tirelessly promote a healthy lifestyle and are really strict about the rule that smoking or drinking or drug use is not permitted anywhere near the premises, and nobody under the influence is admitted. Obviously they don’t manage to keep every kid on the straight and narrow, but they definitely exert some influence, particularly because they’re not seen as being profoundly uncool [as would have been the case when I was growing up] but rather as fun meeting places with cool people working in them.

Granted, the lustre has somewhat worn off with AAH this year, as opposed to last year when the whole thing was new [because she went into junior high school and they work in tandem with these places.] But still. By the time I was fourteen I was smoking and even drinking regularly, and experimenting with pot. AAH has done none of those things [she says, and I believe her] and in fact is militant in her opposition to smoking. Drinking is somewhat more intriguing it would seem [most of her friends have tried it] but she told me the other day that she’s made a pact with herself that she’s not going to drink until after she finishes her standardized nationwide test [similar to O-levels in the UK] when she’s 16. I can only hope she manages to resist the peer pressure and hold out that long.

Sigh. These difficult formative years. When everything is so new and exciting to them. As a parent I really enjoy being an observer and taking a peripheral part in it, but obviously being rich in experience I’m also very much aware of the dangers. I know it’s just a matter of time before she starts experimenting with those things that can so easily lead to disaster, and that nothing can adequately prepare me for how to respond when that happens. I guess I can only be grateful for the fact that, today, candy is still her preferred poison.

AND THE WEATHER?
Overcast, drizzly, with strong wind gusts. Mild, though, 8°C right now and I’m about to head out to the library to borrow some CDs. [Thanks Rozanne!] Meanwhile, the sun came up at 10.09 and will set at 16.16.