May 2006

So the last couple of posts have been a bit gloom-and-doom so today I thought might post about things I’m feeling kind of enthusiastic about right now.

1. Google Earth… have you checked it out yet? I mean, I’d heard it was cool, but nothing prepared me for the pure awe - not to mention childish delight - I felt at sitting and watching the earth from space, and then gradually zooming in… in… in until I was virtually sitting on top of the Toronto Dominion building. [Toronto’s the first place we thought of checking out since we’ll be going there in about a month.] Oh, man. EPI got the virtual tour of all my old haunts [”… and there’s Chinatown… and the Kensington Market… and Riverdale Farm… and the Beaches…]. It wasn’t until yesterday, though, that I thought to have a look at my current hometown i.e. the lovely Reykjavík. I didn’t expect to see all that much, since I had noticed on my earlier google travels that it was a lot easier to see things in Toronto than other - smaller- places, but lo! - turned out it was totally easy to see things here and I can only attribute it to the amazing clarity of the northern light.* The further north you go, the colder its gets, and the more clear the atmosphere. So up here in Niceland you could make out lots of detail… I felt like I was just hovering above the roof of my building, could see the cars in the parking lot and everything. My car was missing, though. Determined then and there that Google Earth is not a live broadcast via satellite, because if it was my car would not be AWOL with me sitting at home. Sleuth.

2. The Reykjavík Academy of Singing and Vocal Arts… where AAH went for an audition yesterday. While standing in the lobby, one of the staff [who turned out to be a head teacher of some sort] approached AAH and gushed, “Aren’t you the girl who sang in West Side Story?” She then proceeded to lavish praise on AAH and the whole cast, then to introduce herself, then to declare her delight that AAH was thinking of studying there. Incidentally - did I mention that this is the top vocal academy in the country?

3. Champagne… I just love the stuff! It always puts me in a great mood. This weekend EPI and I opened a piccolo that we’d had sitting in the fridge for ages and split it before dinner. It was only about a glass for each of us, but it was enough to make me laugh and carry on and sing and dance like crazy for about half an hour. At which time it was time to eat, which was a good thing because who knows how the whole business could have ended? [Note to self: Do Not Try Ecstacy.]

4. Diana Krall Live in Paris… next to EPI, possibly the best companion when drinking Champagne, see above.

5. Men who can cook… Ladies: is there anything more fabulous than a man who loves to cook for you? And who seems to have this innate sensibility for mixing together ingredients so that even the most mundane fare turns into a gourmet meal? And who moreover is funny, and kind, and warm, and a wonderful lover? [No. There is not.]

6. Jovial orthodontists… who only charge ISK 800,000 [USD 11,000] for the privilege of making your child’s smile look like a million bucks. [Note: this is not an example of acerbic wit but rather an example of Positive Thinking. “I am connected to an infinite universal supply…” “My orthodontist is jovial and caring and totally worth the money…” and so on].

7. Sleep… come to think of it, it’s been a long day.

JUST A FEW WORDS ABOUT THE WEATHER…
And a few is all I’m offering because a) I’m beat and b) it sucks. It’s raining buckets and is extremely windy and damp and cold and yick and yuck. Temps are currently 8°C [humph! feels like a lot less, what with the wet windchill] and the sun came up at 03.28 and went down a few minutes ago at 23.25.

* Not to be confused with the Northern Lights, i.e. Aurora Borealis.

Well, EPI and I went and marched on Saturday, and then cast our votes. Sadly, however, the Left-Greens are not likely to be part of the new Reykjavík City Council.* The majority - albeit not a clear majority - went to the right-wing Independence Party, which now takes possession of the city after a 12-year period in which it was goverened by a socialist coalition. Prior to that, the Independence Party was in power for decades. They built a lot of nice buildings, but did less for schools, infrastructure and families. They are also extremely in favour of heavy industry [read: aluminium smelters]. So - We Shall See.

Around 3,000 people took part in the march, according to the organizers, or 1 percent of the population. Which I suppose isn’t too bad, considering that on a relative basis this would mean that 3 million people rallied in the US, or 600,000 in France - the world’s most diligent nation when it comes to protests. Nonetheless, I would have liked to have seen more, if for no other reason than this: Alcoa has declared that if 80% of the Icelandic nation were opposed to its presence in this country, it would get its sorry ass out of here. At the rally the organizers were collecting signatures - around 150,000 are needed for Alcoa to keep its promise. Alas, I fear they received somewhat less than that.

In the meantime, ponder this little factoid: 800,000 tons of aluminium are disposed of annually in the US - enough to replace their entire aircraft fleet four times. Recycling uses a mere 5 percent of the power needed to produce new aluminium. Also, check out this site. Have a look at the banner - the photo on the far right shows the rock formation Bergrisinn [Rock Giant] that has now been destroyed in the making of a giant dam for the power plant that is to supply energy to the Alcoa smelter they’re currently building in the east. And that’s just the beginning.

Apologies this post isn’t more upbeat but I must say I’m feeling rather distraught. I promise to deliver more trivial fare tomorrow.

THE WEATHER IS ALWAYS A GOOD TOPIC…
Particularly when you don’t feel like talking about heavy stuff, and at this very moment it is absolutely gorgeous [imagine what my mood would be like if it were overcast and gloomy]. It was like this yesterday, too - we went to a garden party at EPI’s niece’s place and sat in the sun and ate fish chowder followed by chocolate-covered strawberries for lunch. Perfect. Temps at the moment are 7°C and sunrise this morning was at 03.31 and sunset is due for 23.22.

* The City of Reykjavík owns a large share in power companies that supply power for the aluminium industry.

Sometimes – very occasionally – something you hear, or see, or read, evokes powerful emotions. It speaks to you. Makes you see something in a different light, appreciate something in a different way, shifts something inside. It moves you.

Such a thing happened to me today when I read an article by Andri Snær Magnason in Fréttablaðið. Andri Snær is a brilliant writer, and more than that, is gifted in that he has the ability to distill the truth into a powerful potion. He has recently published a book called Draumalandið – sjálfshjálparbók handa hræddri þjóð, or ‘Dreamland – a self-help book for a frightened nation’, in which he opens up a completely new perspective on the current demolition of this country in the interests of huge multinational aluminium producers, most notably Alcoa. This book has sold 8,000 copies in three months and is in its third printing – record sales for books sold out of the Christmas season in this tiny nation.

I’ve yet to read it, but after reading an interview with Andri Snær in The Grapevine and now this article in Fréttablaðið today, I’m determined to secure myself a copy at the first available opportunity. I’m also determined to follow his resounding call at the end of the article and take part in a march tomorrow, to rally against the sale of our beautiful land for short-sighted interests that, if not averted, will surely lead to utter catastrophe.

In his quiet intense way, Andri Snær lifts the veils one by one.

1. Those of you who have visited Iceland may have noticed the aluminium smelter by the side of the road when you drive from the airport to Reykjavík. That smelter is owned by Alcan, and its directors have openly stated that, unless permission is granted for that smelter to be enlarged to 500,000 tons a year [a tripling of the current size] it will ‘have to be closed’. If and when it is enlarged, despite the government’s propaganda that ‘relative pollution will decrease’ [whatever does that mean?], greenhouse emissions will increase in the amount equal to the doubling of Icelanders’ entire automobile fleet. In other words, carbon dioxide emissions would go from the current 3,500 tons to 6,900 tons per year, and the cloud of smog that hangs over this city on calm clear days in winter will become uglier still.

2. Recently it was announced that Húsavík, a village in the north, had been selected as the site for the next aluminium smelter in Iceland. A party was organized by the Icelandic National Broadcasting Service’s correspondent in the North, during which people met and waited breathlessly for the announcement of which of three sites would be the lucky winner in the ‘who-gets-the-smelter’ lottery. When Húsavík was announced, there was much jubilation at the party organized by the newscaster, who had set it up so as to be able to obtain ‘footage of people rejoicing in Húsavík’. He even made up the slogan they chanted – “álið er málið!” – or, “it’s all about the aluminium!”.

What people didn’t discuss, however, was that the smelter they want to build in Húsavík is really only half a smelter. Its capacity is only 250,000 tons. However, as Alcan has already declared, a smelter with a capacity of less than 500,000 tons is not viable as an operation. In other words, when the Húsavík smelter is built, they’ll have to enlarge it. And to enlarge it, they’ll need more power. No-one has yet broached the subject of where that power will come from. The major rivers up in the north have already been earmarked for the smelter, but it’s not enough. They’ll need more power from somewhere else, just as they needed more power in the east, where they are now tragically destroying a huge portion of this beautiful country, that also happens to be the natural habitat of many different species of birds and animals. Meanwhile, despite all these variables, it is as though a decision to build the smelter in Húsavík is a mere formality, and everyone passively accepts it as a given.

3. Alcoa recently awarded a ‘grant’ to a new national park that is to extend from Skaftafell to Jökulsárgljúfur canyon, in the north. The grant was for the amount of ISK 20 million [a piddly USD 300,000] and has already been accepted. This means that from now on, Alcoa can use the national park as propaganda material and spread the message throughout the world that all this beauty is thanks to Alcoa. The great irony of course is that nothing is a greater threat to these places of breathtaking beauty than the aluminium industry. And a company that is engaged in the greatest destruction ever of Icelandic nature should not be permitted to act as a symbol of its protection.

4. Already the annual capacity of the five existing or proposed aluminium smelters in Iceland is 1.5 millon tons. Four of those will need to be doubled in the future – it’s an illusion to believe otherwise. The two parties that currently make up the coalition government are in favour of more smelters; contractors want them; the Icelandic Federation of Labour wants them; the opposition Social-Democratic Alliance is also on board in some municipalities. Iceland is en route to becoming the largest aluminium smelter in the world.

5. Alcoa has some of the most hard-hitting, clever, cunning negotiators in the world. If power is a chess game, those who make up the councils of Icelandic municipalities are playing against the grand masters. They’re completely out of their depth. They get bulldozed - literally and figuratively.

If Century Aluminium, which owns the smallest smelter in Iceland and which is a tiny company on a global scale, were to merge with Alcoa [quite conceivable], Alcoa would own four smelters in Iceland, all of which would have to be doubled in size. While Icelandic entrepreneurs are doing incredible work on an international scale, producing, for instance, some of the best prosthetics, online computer games, scales for the food processing industries… the government is doing very little to help them stay in the country [whereas countries like Canada, for instance, come to Iceland expressly for the purpose of wooing them with tax breaks etc.] So while all this innovation is being moved out of the country, the aluminium giants are pressing to move in. And they will, as they do now, seek to gain entry through political means. And incidentally, none of the Icelandic political parties have open accounts. There is no transparency.

Tomorrow municipal elections will be held throughout Iceland. I shall attend the planned march, and the rally afterwards. And then I shall go and give my vote to the party that will not cast the pearls of this nation before swine.

Hi,
We were in Athens for the event and Silvia’s meltdown. On Saturday we went to the Acropolis and she showed up with her entourage and it was fabulous. She couldn’t have been more playful and charming!

Jim Smyth *

Meanwhile, EPI and I entertained ourselves at dinner with thoughts of what it would be like if every single Icelander started acting like Silvía Nótt. The Prime Minister would have tantrums on a daily basis, storm into his office and slam the door so that the window above it fell to the ground. Icelandair stewardesses would diss airline passengers to their faces [’Ugh, what an ugly shirt!’] and spit in their general direction if they asked for something. Icelandic diplomats would call their foreign counterparts ‘fucking amateurs’ and ’say fuck if I fucking want to’. Just imagine. Soon there would be worldwide sanctions brought against Iceland, we’d be kicked out of the EEA and the UN, and all over the world governments would warn their citizens not to go to Iceland because all the people there were fucking crazy. Every Icelander living abroad would panic and immediately try to cover up the fact that they were Icelanders, relocate to someplace else, other than where they live, and when asked about where they came from casually say, ‘Oh, I immigrated from Poland’, or something.

Wouldn’t that be fun? If the Icelandic nation took its cue from Silvía Nótt?

Meanwhile, as pundits [still] rattle on in the media about ‘the implications’ of the circus that Silvía directed with such aplomb in Athens, the girl herself appears to have evaporated into thin air. Suspect it won’t be long, though. Mark my words.

SLIGHT RESPITE FROM THE COLD TODAY…
Mainly in the form of less wind, oh yes!! The wind is what makes the weather insufferable around here - I’ve said it once and I’ll say it again, if there’s no wind, the weather is always beautiful in Iceland. There’s been a chill in the air all day, but the sun was out and EPI and I managed to head to the Laugardalslaug pool. YT even caught a few Zs on a sun lounger. Right now it’s 7°C and sunrise here in the capital was at 03.42, sunset is due for 23.10.

* Published by permission.

In the beginning, there was craptop number one. Then came craptop number two, which some of you may remember was eventually refunded in full. And now – brace yourselves – we have craptop number three. Yes, dear readers, after an entire month of use coupled with serious kid-glove treatment, my new IBM/Lenovo ThinkPad decided was time to bite the dust. It simply stopped working the other morning. Just like that. The hard drive died.

If I hadn’t already wasted far too much energy getting suitably enraged about stupid old – sorry, new – craptops that have major malfunctions, I would probably be livid. As it is, I’m calmly petting my faithful old Toshiba Satellite that appears to be indestructible and has proven itself far far superior to its upscale, modern brethren. Good Toshiba. Good.

MEANWHILE I BET YOU’RE WONDERING WHY…
I have not kept my promise [or threat, whichever fits] and given you the full lowdown on the Return of Silvía… well, the truth is that either Silvía has managed to slip into the country absolutely unnoticed without whipping up any fanfare whatsoever, or she simply has not returned. I’m leaning towards the latter, because a) I cannot envision the character known as Silvía Nótt not whipping up fanfare if there is any possibility of doing so [i.e., when she left the country she was all dressed up in this pseudo-national costume, doing the royal wave, and was subsequently photographed in the cockpit of the plane with the pilots] and b) a very kind reader emailed to tell me that he had seen Silvía at the Acropolis the day after her big meltdown and she had been very funny and gracious and nice. And as if to prove that it was the same Silvía [presumably because the description doesn’t exactly fit with what she has become famous for] he even attached pictures. And after studying them I had to concede that, yes indeed, it’s the same girl.

WINTER IS STILL BLASTING US WITH COLD WEATHER
Really, we’re in quite a state around here. Up north they’ve had loads of snow in the past few days, farmers have had to bring all their livestock back indoors [news footage yesterday showing sheep and wee lambs all scrunched together in barns, very sad], there are fears that the eider duckies will run into trouble as some of them have already laid eggs that presumably they’ll have to abandon… or something… and generally we are just sick and tired of being cold and having all this fricking wind all the time. So – send warmth. soon. please. preferably immediately, so we won’t have to suffer for the rest* of the weekend like the weatherman is threatening we’ll have to. The sun came up at 03.45 and went down at 23.06.

* You may have noticed my Freudian slip in saying the ‘rest’ of the weekend - that’s because tomorrow is a holiday [Ascension Day donchaknow, we Icelanders get very pious if there’s a holiday to be had out of it] and so today feels like a Friday. And the real Friday will feel like a holiday because it’s stuck between a holiday and a holiday, if you see what I mean, so it won’t feel like a real working day. Which is why I made that very understandable minor error.

Well she may not have made it through to the Eurovision finals, but the phenom known as Silvía Nótt could not have drummed up more publicity for herself even if she had emerged as the winner. Indeed, the fact that she was eliminated apparently gave her just the opportunity she needed to become this year’s Eurovision sensation. The buzz surrounding her is enormous – on this site alone there have been hundreds of hits over the past few days searching for ‘silvia nott’ ‘iceland eurovision scandal’ ‘agusta eva’ ‘iceland eurovision crazy’ ‘agusta eva erlendsdottir agent’… or any variety thereof.

Links abound: if you’ve been reading the comments to the last few post you’ve surely seen this and this; and just this morning a kind reader emailed me to say that he’d found links here to Silvía’s Icelandic TV shows – you know, the ones that unleashed the beast. Unfortunately you have to speak Icelandic to get the full comic effect, but for diehard fans… bitteschön. Oh and if you want a glimpse behind the façade, here’s a stream of photos of Ágústa Eva [the actress behind Silvía] with the band she used to front – Ske.

At any rate, the Icelandic delegation is due home from Athens today, which will probably mean another round of media madness. Watch this space.

I’M SURE YOU’LL FIND THIS HARD TO BELIEVE…
But I did not spend my entire weekend breathlessly waiting for the latest scandal from Athens. This weekend, my dear father-in-law celebrated his 80^th birthday, and what a marvellous affair it was. Around 150 illustrious personages, including the Prime Minister of Iceland and several cabinet ministers, gathered together to sing the birthday song and wish him well. A programme was put together in which no speeches were allowed, save for an obligatory single one that covered the essentials.

He’s done good with his life, my father-in-law. His career accomplishments are many: as a Minister of Culture and Education he was instrumental in accomplishing things that mean a great deal to this nation, including the founding of the University of Akureyri and the construction of the new National University Library. As President of the lower house of the Icelandic parliament he travelled the world and met and entertained dignitaries and world leaders. But perhaps most importantly, he cultivated loving relationships with his wife and family. When EPI’s mother became ill with Alzheimers he nursed her at home for years, refusing to have her placed in an institution until it became impossible not to. Since she died last year, he has been enormously active… amazingly so. Example: he had never been to Cuba and wanted very much to see it before Castro dies, so this spring he went on a week’s vacation there, on his own. He writes articles in the newspapers, takes an active part in social discourse, and amuses himself by writing limericks and poetry.* At his birthday celebration this weekend, an exceptionally wonderful vocal ensemble performed two compositions that have been written based on his lyrics, and when the party was over he gave everyone in attendance a book of exceptional - and many hilarous - limericks written by himself.

This was on Saturday afternoon. Afterwards we all came back to our place – EPI’s brother, sisters, various kids and spouses. And EPI’s father of course – who brought flowers… lots of them [having received many bouquets]. He also brought wine [having received many bottles] and cognac [having…etc.] and while we barbecued and talked and basically had a great party, the Eurovision Song Contest went virtually unnoticed in the background [despite all my public declarations of listening to Terry Wogan, etc.]. So I do know that Finland took home the trophy, which is great, but apart from that I don’t know very much at all.

AS FOR THE WEATHER - FOILED AGAIN!
Just when you thought it was safe to remove that down jacket, here comes another blast of winter. It’s been insufferably cold the last few days, the sun has been out as though to mock our thoughts of spring, while heavy winds from the north and temps around the freezing mark make it feel more like January. Right now it’s windy and 1°C and up north the ground is covered with snow. We’re having daylight around the clock these days but officially the sun came up at 03.51 and will set at 23.00 this evening.

* This is not as simple as it sounds, as Icelandic poetry is subject to some fairly complicated rules. Very basically: the first line must have two words beginning with the same letter, and then the first word of the following line must also begin with that letter. There are some deviations, though, which I won’t get into here. Imagine, though - all Icelandic translations of poetry, songs, etc. must be written according to these rules, and all of Shakespeare is translated in this way.

So, all day long, pundits up here have been rattling on about Eurovision, giving their expert views on Silvía and what-went-wrong and yadayadayada. Even old Morgunblaðið, which is renowned for its highbrow cultural supplement on Saturdays, is publishing a feature tomorrow entitled “What is Silvía Nótt?” – The emphasis obviously being on the ‘What’ as opposed to ‘Who’.

It’s a valid question and as worthy of intellectual acrobatics as any other. The question, in a nutshell, is this: Is Silvía [well, actually it’s Ágústa Eva, who plays Silvía]… Is Ágústa Eva, through her act, providing a deep and meaningful commentary on modern culture? Is she, by pushing the envelope the way she does, by creating a cartoon character that is superficial, empty, pornographic, with warped values and a mouth like a sailor – in short, a composite of a lot of what is wrong with our modern society – actually highlighting those flaws? Acting as a mirror? Bringing things into focus, if you will?

Or is she just… superficial and empty?

The crux of what happened in Athens, what with all the booing and disdain, is that people didn’t really get that Silvía Nótt isn’t real – she’s theatre. She’s a character played by an actress, who may or may not be doing something important. However, as veteran Eurovision-goer Páll Óskar* summed up in Kastljós this evening, most people who sit down in front of their TV screens to watch Eurovision do so with no prior knowledge of what or who Silvía Nótt is, hence they don’t get the joke. They are offended. And who can blame them? It took the Icelandic nation about six months to catch on to her act, after her TV show first appeared on the air. People were baffled. Didn’t know what to make of her. Thought she was incredibly stupid or incredibly funny, or both. And after a while some people started to think that she might actually be more than just the sum of her parts.

But back to the banal: Ágústa Eva, as Silvía, has had a pretty strenuous few days. [Hell, more than a few days – she toured several European countries beforehand, plus she’s just finished shooting a dramatic role in a major Icelandic feature that is currently in production – Jar City, based on the novel by golden-boy Arnaldur Indriðason.] You can believe that it takes incredible stamina to stay in character and keep the circus going for an entire week, as the whole Silvía Nótt delegation has been doing. No wonder they’ve been suffering from exhaustion – especially Silvía, who presumably cannot ever leave her room as Ágústa Eva the actress, and has to spend hours in a makeup chair before she can step out in public. And say what you will about her behavior and whether or not she deserved the harsh reception, but to actually go on stage and deliver a stellar performance the way she did knowing she was doing so in front of a very hostile audience and 150 million television viewers – I mean, you have to hand it to her. You really do.

However, the best suggestion I heard today – which also came from Páll Óskar, who talked a lot of sense – was to have Silvía Nótt do part of the Eurovision commentary during the main competition tomorrow night. Now that would be something worth watching – she’d probably even give Terry Wogan a run for his money.** I say she should be shanghaied into it. After all, we the People Of Iceland are paying her salary at the moment, are we not?

OH, WHAT? YOU WANT WEATHER??
Can’t imagine what could be more interesting than deep insightful analysis of the Sylvía Nótt phenomena, but if you insist. It’s been a beautiful day today, i.e. the sun has been shining. There’s been wind, though, which is never very pleasant [well except it blows our pollution away to places like Athens, which is always inundated with smog I’m told] and thus a bit cool. Winds from northerly directions [also a minus] and current temps are 7°C. Daybreak today was at 01.50 and… would you believe it! Tonight is the first night this year when there is NO nightfall, because after tonight it doesn’t get dark ALL NIGHT LONG! Huzzah!

* Páll Óskar pushed the envelope himself when he represented Iceland in 1997 and did this sado-maso kind of number in black latex and whathaveyou. I couldn’t help noticing last night that a bunch of the acts had girls dressed in very similar outfits – corsets, stockings – as Páll Óskar had his backup singers dressed in back then… only at that time it caused an outrage. Incidentally, there’s a rather embarrassing “shrine” dedicated to PÓ here.

** Terry Wogan is the British commentator that spends the whole Eurovision broadcast making snarky comments about the contestants. I’ve never actually heard him but he’s said to be pretty funny and if we watch the contest at home tomorrow – that is if Silvía can’t be persuaded to do some of the Icelandic commentary – I’m watching Eurovision on the BBC. Definitely.

jmc has kindly provided a link to the Silvía Eurovision performance last night… make of it what you will, but please do keep your tongue embedded in your cheek. One thing that’s definitely noticeable is that she’s really short of breath, having been ill the day before.

He also asked about the link to the news programme where she’s interviewed afterwards, and it’s here. It’s in Icelandic, though. Maybe I’ll do a wee transcript later if I feel up to it, because it’s totally hilarious.

Must run. Laters!

So, obviously we watched the Eurovision semi-finals this evening like real troupers - we even got out the barbecue and EPI cooked up some lamb filets and baked potatoes that we imbibed in front of the telly. The songs were the usual Eurovision study in sappy mediocrity and camp unoriginality… until the end, when we got a double whammy - the excellent song from Bosnia-Herzegovina, that I sincerely hopes wins the finals [it got my vote tonight] and then of course old Silvia, who got BOOOOO..ed both before and after her performance. Which incidentally counts as originality, because I don’t recall that ever happening before.

Long story short [because it’s late and time for bedz, even if it’s still daylight outside] old Silvia didn’t make it through to the finals, which came as no surprise, really, as she managed to offend just about everyone and their grandmother over in Eurovisionland.

The big question was, how would she appear after her big defeat. And on the 10 o’clock news she delivered possibly her best performance to date. Totally in character, she appeared with huge sunglasses and streaks of black mascara reaching from behind them right down to her chin, and sobbed and whined about how everyone in Europe is a loser and she tried so hard including speaking only English and everything, and said all those awful things to everyone and she was sorry but she really really didn’t mean it, and next she’s going to America where “people have a brain” and everyone can tell the difference between what’s cool and what’s not. Impossible to do the clip justice in this space, but it was just perfect. She ended on a brave note by saying she couldn’t wait to come home and see all the people who will come to greet and cheer her at the airport.