From the monthly archives:

February 2008

The Iceland Weather Repoty

by alda on February 28, 2008

Welcome to the Iceland Weather Repoty. Yes, dear readers, someone actually searched for this last night and found this website, after which they splashed around in these murky waters for a total of 7 minutes and 52 seconds, and viewed 6 pages. Which I suppose is all a testimony to the fact that Google is invincible and is not above washing the feet of the linguistically feeble [witness all those porno doogs], and moreover guides them gently and lovingly to green pastures where they may while away their 7 minutes and 52 seconds in carefree repose, amen.

OR, it just means YT has too much time on her hands, sifting through google searches and checking stats.

Which incidentally I do not, in fact I am flailing around in turbulent waters these days, having a workload that would easily sink the Titanic three times over, which is why I can only spout inane drivel and why you, dear readers, are not receiving well-crafted, insightful exposés on, say, the heated, ongoing debate about whether or not Niceland should adopt the euro and, by extension, whether we should finally, once and for all, definitively, no more sitting on the fence, join the freaking European Union. And why I can only write sentences that are barely coherent and go on and on, like the one above.

I guess maybe I should make myself a cup of strong coffee. Because, like, it’s only 10 o’clock in the morning and I have a full day of mental exertion ahead. Wish me luck.

SERIOUSLY, IT JUST WILL NOT STOP SNOWING
A moment ago I looked out my window and it was like looking at a wall of white. We’re back down to flurries now, lots of them drifting around lazily like they’re not in a hurry to go anywhere, like they’re planning to stick around until, oh, the beginning of July. Which is what it feels like around here - that this winter will last forever. Temps -3°C [27F] and sunrise was at 8.41 and sunset due for 6.41.

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The little bitch goes home

by alda on February 26, 2008

We bid a tearful farewell to the little bitch* today [aka the Yaris] after I’d managed to squeeze out an extra few days with her thanks to the extreme tardiness of the auto shop that was fixing my car. They never call to let you know when they’ve finished the repairs [annoying], and in this case, seeing as how I had a rental car in lieu, I didn’t bother to chase after them [annoying for them no doubt, seeing as how they had to call eventually to get the Yaris back, nyah].

Anyway, I’m pining for a new car, even though I absolutely cannot justify buying one because, well, I hardly ever use a car. I work from home and I walk almost everywhere I need to go because I relish the fresh air and exercise. I’ve had mine for eight years now, it’s ten years old and has only 64,000 km on it [around 30,000 miles]. Plus it’s paid in full, and it seems very silly to take out a loan on a new car when it would just sit in front of the house looking pretty all the time. And my old one works perfectly well, gives me minimal grief, and is perfectly functional for trips to Bónus and suchlike. So even though I’m the last person in Iceland who does NOT own a SUV** I’m not going to be tempted. To buy one of those, or a Yaris. It’s just too extravagant a luxury. Right?

Right?

OKAY, SO I OCCASIONALLY TAKE THE CAR WHEN THE WEATHER IS CRAP
Because that’s one of the main reasons for owning a car in this country - so you can get in the car when those mean winds come whipping down from the Arctic. Not that it worked out so well for me last time, but that’s another story. Today was a pretty good day - temps just below freezing and minimal wind, which is good. We even had the sun shine upon us for brief periods this afternoon. Temps now -3°C [27F], sunrise was at 8.48 am and sunset at 6.35 pm.

* As she’s affectionately known chez YT
** Take my dear father in law, who at the ripe young age of 82 has just gone out and bought himself a Nissan X-Trail.

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It’s pretty scary when you can’t turn us off just by closing a window

by alda on February 25, 2008

So, I went to my first Expat Quiz Night here in Reykjavík last Friday. Apparently they have them once a month at Café Cultura, in the Intercultural Centre, but then how would I know because I’m obviously not a genuine expat, just as I’m not a genuine Nicelander. [Falling through the cracks: the story of my life *sob*]. In fact I wouldn’t even have known about it if my friend Jonas hadn’t alerted me, which I’m certainly glad he did because a) I had a blast b) we came in second and even won a prize, huzzah! c) they have Leffe on tap up there. The total spoils amounted to about 700 kronur for each of us, which meant we broke even [it cost 500 kronur in] and earned us a small subsidy towards our next beer. Sweet.

On our team [of five] was a guy named Simon, who was holidaying from Toronto because apparently they don’t get enough cold and snow over there. Our conversation went something like this:

YT: So, you’re from Toronto?
Simon: Yes I am.
YT: I used to live in Toronto.
S: Oh really?
YT: Where in Toronto do you live?
S: Cabbagetown.
YT: Oh, I used to live in Cabbagetown.
S: Really?
YT: Yeah. I lived on Spruce Street.
S: I live on Spruce Street.

Crazy, huh? Turns out he’d come to Niceland last year and had been bitten by the dreaded Niceland Bug [to which some foreigners seem particularly susceptible], so he’d turned up again. In the interim he’d been corresponding with Jonas and Eliza [who also showed up at the pub quiz] through the Iceland Review website, and was also familiar with the Weather Report, although he didn’t figure out until a couple of ‘entertainment breaks’ [i.e. cigarette and drink-run breaks] who YT was. At which time he was duly floored, and blurted out: “My God, my virtual life is coming true! You people actually exist!”

Definitely the quote of the evening if you ask me.

THIS IS PROBABLY THE MOST BEAUTIFUL MORNING SINCE, UM YESTERDAY
It’s gorgeous out there – sunny and cold, with barely a hint of a breeze. [Yesterday morning was gorgeous as well.] It’s set to cloud over around noon, though, with strong winds and precipitation later. Meaning I should get meself out for a run pronto. Temps -5°C [23F] and the sun came up at 8.51, will go down at 6.32 pm.

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Get this, get the essence

by alda on February 24, 2008

EPI and I have just come back from one fantastic concert: Hinn Íslenski þursaflokkur with the Caput ensemble, performing at Laugardalshöll arena.

This was their 30th anniversary concert and they reassembled for just this one night, having disbanded in 1982. The Laugardalshöll was packed [it takes around 5,500 people, according to Wikipedia], which gives some indication of their popularity, even today. Truly, they are one of the best, if not the best, Icelandic bands ever. They’re one of those cultural treasures that mirror a sense of identity, strength and pride. Their sound resonates in the heart and consciousness of everyone who has their roots here. I’m not sure foreigners would get them in the same way … I’m just not sure – but I would venture to say that to really truly get the soul of Iceland, you have to get this band.

Basically, when they started they took ancient folk songs and ancient text, and transposed them into the 20th century, without losing any of their ‘folky roots’ – ach! I dislike that phrase, so generic … let’s say, without losing any of their ‘unique Icelandicness’.* Their sound is one that I think every Icelander responds to because it evokes the isolation, the melancholy, the remarkable tenacity and resilience of the people who eked out a living here in centuries past. My absolute favourite song of theirs is Grafskript – a sung composition of an exquisitely beautiful text found on a gravestone from 1763. You can see them perform it – with Caput – on Kastljós [a few days ago] here.

Anyway, the concert was amazing, the band was stupendous, and Egill Ólafsson – ‘band leader’ for lack of a better term, was funny, warm and completely engaging – like he was entertaining 5,500 of his best friends at home in his living room. I don’t like this [overused] word, but I’ll use it tonight: AWESOME.

SNOW, TEMPS AROUND THE FREEZING MARK
-2°C [28F] to be exact, and the sun comes up later today at 8.59 am and sets at 6.25 pm.

* Mind you, some of their later material was a bit more modern – they composed music for the stage, for example, which isn’t really of the same ilk.

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Just make sure you wash them off before you enter the pool

by alda on February 22, 2008

Ah, yes, dear readers. The latest googlie searches: floating refuse from the dark, aquatic depths of cyberspace. Read them and weep.

~ The “porno dog” brigade was out in all its barking glory, with slight variations on a theme:

dog end vomen porn [Ankara, Turkey]

vomen end dog porn [Urfa, Turkey]

dog porno . com [USA]

porno doog [Croatia]

what ever happened to the porno dog [anyone? - Pittsburg, Pennsylvania]

pono dog [Budapest]

porns dog [Berlin]

Poro dog [Izmir, Turkey]

~ There were those seriously afflicted with swimming pool anxiety:

swimming pool in reykjavik that you dont have to shower naked [nice try, but there’s no escaping the shower police, mwaha! - Banbury, Oxfordshire]

laugardalslaug pregnant [and soon there will be a squadron of baby laugardalslaugar - Lyon, France]

“wash thoroughly without a swimsuit” [yes, that is what the shower police will tell you before they strip you down. - San Mateo, California]

~ There were those who were very sincere in their quest for knowledge:

who needs the weather?-information [A question many readers ask, I’m sure. - London]

how to take a picture of your own penis [again?? You’d think it was rocket science already. -Marietta, Georgia]

how to get a flat buttocks [um, just sit there for a while. No, a while longer. No, a really long time. There. - Neath, UK]

should no sex be announced when you first meet someone [yes. Preferably using a microphone. - West Memphis, Arkansas]


~ There were those concerned with the finer points of Niceland and its people:

reports on iceland iceland [this is the place place! - Victoria, BC]

ice land porn [land porn. A new niche. - Venezuela]

iceland chick [the one, the only - Montreal, Quebec]

hitting on women in iceland [just walk up to one, put your hand over her boob and say ‘fuck me immediately’. We prefer the direct approach here. - Atlanta, Georgia]

What do they do in Iceland [a) pick their noses. b) sit around writing inane googlie posts. - Matteson, Illinois]


~ And finally, the unclassified remains:

sexy penis in virginia [there’s got to be one there somewhere. - Kingston, Jamaica]

because i sad so photos [I sad so too. We sad so together? - Riga]

cockatiel that won the west [coming soon to a theatre near you. Polly’s champing at the bit. - NY, NY]

my mother died [no way! mine too. - Croatia.]

~ That’s all folks.

BEAUTIFUL THIS MORNING
Then we had a blizzard, then strongwinds, and now a little bit of sunshine. What’s officially known as ‘chequered weather’ here in Niceland. And which demonstrates that winter has not yet released us from its icy grip. Harumph. Temps right now 2°C [36F], sunrise was at 9.01 and sunset due for 6.22 pm.

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The last time this happened, I bought a new car

by alda on February 21, 2008

My car’s in the shop, so I’ve been zipping around on a rented Toyota Yaris since yesterday. I’m completely smitten. It’s so nimble. So quick. So easy to maneuver out in traffic.

I don’t want my old car back. I want the Yaris.

SNOWING AGAIN
But not too much, so that’s OK. And there’s no wind, so that’s doubly OK. And I have a Yaris to drive around, so I don’t care anyway. Temps currently -1°C [30F] and the sun came up at 9.05 am and set at 6.19. And now if you’ll excuse me, I must go watch an episode of Grey’s Anatomy.

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Adoptakind.is

by alda on February 20, 2008

Always dreamed of owning your very own Icelandic sheep but just couldn’t find a place for it out on the balcony? Well, now you can, thanks to kindur.is, which allows you to either adopt or purchase a sheep [aka kind] on an Icelandic farm, name it, choose a ram for breeding, utilize the wool from it and, if you so choose, have the meat from its little lambs processed and sent to you every autumn [sniff]. Although presumably you have to be within Iceland to make use of that last option.

Isn’t that just the most ingenious idea you’ve ever heard? After all, adopting children through the SOS programme or UNICEF is just so passé, and anyway, they don’t produce any wool.

Seriously though, I think this kindur.is a brilliant concept. It works like this: you go online and choose your sheep and whether you merely want to adopt, or whether you would like to buy. If you adopt a sheep you get a Christmas card with your meh-meh on it, which provides details of what it’s been up to over the year [… grazing, and, um … grazing], you get access to the farm that fosters your sheep and are allowed to visit it five or six times a year [note the set limit – not sure the farmer would think it’s a great idea if you were there every day, gazing lovingly at your sheep out in the meadow], and for a nominal fee you get the wool from your sheep when it’s been sheared and can have it sent for processing, which would eventually mean the delivery of a pair of mitts, or a scarf, or a hat, to your very own doorstep. Or even all three, if you have a large sheep.

Meanwhile, if you purchase a sheep, you can pick out the one you want from an online catalogue, give it a name [although you may have to have it approved by the Naming Committee – no ‘Lucifers’ please], visit it five or six times a year, and during an open house day at the farm you can pick out a suitable mate for your sheep and then, come autumn, get the products from their, um, offspring sent home. For a nominal fee you can have the wool processed, as above, and for an additional nominal fee you can have your sheep inseminated by the ram of your choice, picked from a register that lists all of Iceland’s hottest ram studs, yowsa [for those who want only the best for their Elsie]. Also, you can have your meat processed the way you want it, e.g. smoked, and also the sheepskin processed to make rugs, gloves, hats, and so on.

Apparently this venture has been met with resounding enthusiasm and sheep farmers nationwide have really taken to the idea. Meanwhile, EPI and YT are still deliberating on whether to adopt, or whether to try and produce our own. Stay tuned.

ADDENDUM: Hlédís, who owns kindur.is, has written a comment in the comments box, explaining about the English-language version of her site, and more.

JUST WHEN YOU THOUGHT SPRING WAS HERE
It starts to snow again. Met my neighbour outside this morning while clearing the snow off the car and we both agreed that we were getting more than a little weary of this. I mean, what’s all this about global warming, and why can’t we have some? Currently 1°C [34F] and the sun came up at 9.08 and will set at 6.16 this evening.

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Við Tjörnina: slightly dusty and a notch above average

by alda on February 18, 2008

Við Tjörnina, literally translated, means “By Tjörnin” – Tjörnin being a Reykjavík landmark that, depending on who you talk to, is either a pond or a lake. [Personally I think it’s too large to be the former and too small to be the latter – so for lack of a better word we’ll call it a ‘poke’.] Hence it should come as no surprise that the Við Tjörnina restaurant is located – you guessed it – by the poke.

In the 15 or so years it’s been open [anybody, feel free to correct me], Við Tjörnina has become somewhat of a Reykjavík institution. Primarily known for its fish dishes and its comfy old décor, it’s the sort of place where Nicelanders tend to take tourists for dinner. I’m going to avoid at all costs the description “just like your granny’s living room” because that’s how every tourist brochure tends to describe it, but, well, you get the picture. Old stuff. Old telephones, old sofas, old ornaments. And tableware that doesn’t match, on purpose.

About 12 years ago, when I first went there, the ‘old’ thing was all gleaming and shiny, particularly the glansmyndir – glossy pictures – that were stuck up on the walls. Unfortunately now the ‘old’ is, well, a little old. It just doesn’t enchant in the same way it used to. It’s a bit like a grey veneer of complacency has sort of descended on everything including, sadly, the food.

Anyway. Back to our evening last Saturday. We all met up in the lounge [granny’s living room] for an aperitif. I ordered a Kir Royale – my tipple of choice when I was about, oh, [mumblemuble] back in the disco era, and which I hadn’t tasted in almost as long. To their credit, they make an excellent Kir Royale at Við Tjörnina. In fact, if your grandmother drank Kir Royale, that is probably exactly how she would make it.

While there, we checked out the menu and a delightful waitress took our order. A few moments later we were ushered to our table. A waiter came with our wine [Pouilly Fuisse – wonderful] and did everything by the book, opening it at the table [you’d be surprised how many supposedly classy restaurants here just plonk the bottle down on the table already opened], holding the bottle so that the label was displayed while the tasting was done, etc. The only thing he missed was that he didn’t fill the glasses of the ladies before filling those of the men [having worked in some very fine establishments myself, I’m a stickler for these things] but we’ll forgive him for that because after all, here in Iceland, the women are men.*

Next came our starters. I’d ordered “Sauted [sic] scallops w/tomato and garlic” because I absolutely love a good, tender, melt-in-your-mouth scallop. Sadly, the consistency of these reminded me more of a fish ball from a can than a tender miym scallop, although it did have the same delicate, gorgeous taste. EPI, his father and brother all ordered “Pickled herring & fermented shark w/schnapps” [jawol!] wheras my sister-in-law had “Hot smoked lamb’s heart w/applesalad and horseradishcream”.** Nobody complained.

For a main course I ordered what I ordered the last time I was there [about three years ago] because it was so fabulous back then: “Sauteed plaice w/blue cheese and banana”. As expected, the fish was very fresh and on the whole the dish was tasty – but it wasn’t very hot. In fact, it was only lukewarm. Due probably in no small part to the fact that the plates were cold. Which brings me to another point: I fail to understand why restaurants here in Iceland just cannot keep their plates warm. Sheesh! An essential part of serving a good meal is serving it hot and in my book, serving it hot is mutually exclusive with loading it onto a cold plate. What the hell are they teaching in Cooking 101 these days!?

For dessert EPI and I decided to split a French chocolate cake because once upon a time the French chocolate cake at Við Tjörnina was famous and there was even one occasion when we made a point of going there just for the cake because we were having a craving. Alas, we failed to remember that these days French chocolate cake is no longer such a novelty and in fact even EPI and I make a perfectly good French chocolate cake now in our very own kitchen. And so, like the old-style décor, the cake had somehow lost its lustre, in spite of the sculpted dollop of cream they stuck on the top.

Yeah, so anyway, I’m aware that I’m sounding pretty damn bleh about the whole thing, which is unfortunate because in fact I had a lovely time on Saturday night. In fact, I was having such a lovely time that I really didn’t have the inclination to be underwhelmed about the food whilst there, nor to consider the fact that the waiter kept reaching his arm over me to pick up or deliver plates so that I virtually had my face in his armpit. Water off a duck’s back, as they say, thanks in no small part to the lovely company I was in.

Final verdict: Við Tjörnina is an okay place for dinner that can remember its dandelion more beautiful*** and that appears to have become somewhat complacent over the years. Food: a tiny notch above average [quite unacceptable considering the prices they charge.] Service: friendly and amiable but could have done without all the armpit-gazing or [cough] smelling. Ambiance: relaxed but a tad dusty in the metaphorical sense.

WEATHER: It’s been mild and calm today with rain. Wind is picking up now. 3°C [46F], sunrise was at 9:15 am and sunset at 6:09 pm.

* i.e. somewhere, some committee decided that the masculine pronoun should be used to refer to both men and women.
** Sadly, I always feel it reflects badly on a place when they can’t have their menus properly translated.
*** Nicelandic idiom meaning ‘it used to be better’.

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A short reflection on living and learning

by alda on February 16, 2008

Last night my father-in-law invited EPI and I, and EPI’s brother and his wife, out to a lavish dinner at Við Tjörnina*. Just … because.

I’m such a fan of my father-in-law. When I’m 82 I want to be just like him. Well, maybe not just like him, but similar. He’s completely unstoppable. After EPI’s mother died a couple of years ago, he could easily have withdrawn and given up, robbed of his raison d’etre [she had Alzheimer’s for many years and he took care of her] - but no. A few [difficult] months after her death he announced one day that he was moving out of his condo and into a hotel for a few days so he could have some work done on the place. That burst of energy was just a small sign of things to come. Next he decided to fly to London to buy some material for a bespoke suit, because in his opinion the quality of the stuff they had here wasn’t good enough. On his return, he announced that he was throwing a grand party to celebrate his 80th birthday. He rented a hall at one of the better hotels in town, invited about 200 people, and after everyone had eaten and drank and generally had a lovely time, he sent everyone home with a book he’d published - of limericks that he had composed over the years [he’s an accomplished writer of poetry and his work has appeared in many publications].

His next undertaking was to start ‘collecting islands’. He travelled to Cuba, then Svalbard in Norway, then Greenland. Up next are the Hebrides, this May. When he’s not off gallivanting abroad, he’s on the go here in Iceland, visiting friends or family, particularly in Akureyri, which was his constituency for many years [he was in politics for almost all of his career]. He follows social and current events with great dedication, and takes part in the discourse by writing articles and sending them to the papers. In short, he engages with life. And while I’m sure his days are not always peachy he never complains or tries to manipulate others into being responsible for his wellbeing. On the contrary, he makes a point of being proactive and staying in touch, even if it’s just calling up to say hello for a minute or two. He shows up at any birthday party thrown - children’s, grandchildren’s, even great-grandchildren’s - and does surprising and unexpected things like invite us out for dinner at an expensive restaurant, just … because.

Truly, I feel so blessed to have EPI’s family around me. I have learned so much from them. They are so very different from my own family, with its extensive dysfunction and lack of communication. With EPI’s family I get to see how a normal family operates, all the things that are given so freely, that I have never experienced on my own skin. Things that lots of people consider normal, that for me have been such a revelation. No need to cite examples; suffice it to say that in my family everything is just much more … difficult. Or perhaps just a lot more … absent.

FROM THE ‘COLD PUDDLE’, WE NOW SIMPLY HAVE ‘THE PUDDLE’
Because it hasn’t stopped raining for the last three days. It’s great, though - mild temps for the first time in weeks and almost all the snow has melted, which most importantly means that all the ice is gone. In fact, I could very well have been mistaken, but I could have sworn I felt the first whiff of spring in the air today. Temps are currently 5°C [40F] and our sun came up at 9.22 this morning and set at 6.03 this afternoon.

* whose website seems to be out of commission right now.

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Smokin’ in the [ig]loo

by alda on February 13, 2008

The wretched cold puddle has not been kind to smokers who, since the implementation of the nationwide smoking ban, must huddle outside on the sidewalks in the freezing cold to get their fix. Not so in Ísafjörður, however, where an ingenious pub owner has constructed a rather unorthodox - not to mention deliciously cozy - smoking salon.

It’s enough to make me want to start smoking again, so I can have one in my own backyard.

MORE WIND, BUT WORKING TOWARDS A THAW
We had rain, which wiped away the last vestiges of snow and left only … ice. And lots and lots of meltwater. Temps now 7°C [45F]. Sun came up at 9.32 am and set at 5.53.

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