So EPI and I are just rockin’ with the Advent Christmas preparations, best exemplified by our long journey out to IKEA today to stock up on candles. I normally try to avoid IKEA, partly because of the lengthy drive and partly because, by the time I’m halfway done with those endless circles around the store [yes, I know you can cut through in places, but once I'm there I just lose all control and become compelled to ogle all those endless living rooms, bedrooms, bathrooms, kitchens, cubbyhole flats they have on display] … by the time I’m halfway done with those endless circles and detours, I’m totally wasted. I also happen to think there’s something wrong with the air in there. Or maybe it’s that electric pollution people talk about – you know, magnetic fields and all that stuff. Too many halogen lights or something.
Anyway, I try to avoid it, but there always comes a point when avoidance is no longer possible, and that point is when I run out of candles. And in fact I ran out of candles a couple of weeks ago and have been using candles bought in [gasp!] Bónus, and it just ain’t the same, you know? IKEA is the place for candles. It’s where I’ve always gone to stock up on candles. It’s also where I go to stock up on a million other items that I didn’t know were absolutely essential to my life until I saw them in IKEA. In fact, here is a brief list of what EPI and I bought, in addition to the candles that were the purpose of our trip:
a set of rubber basters . a set of rubber spatulas . a set of dish towels . two bath towels . a poinsettia . a cup measure . a package of small patterned paper napkins . a package of large purple paper napkins . a metal frame to hold drawers . two metal drawers . two big plastic drawers . a plastic storage box . cookies . ginger snaps . a clip-on light . two servings of hangikjöt with potatoes, white sauce, green peas and pickled red cabbage . one can of jólaöl
Those last two purchases were made in the IKEA cafeteria, which is seriously the most brilliant thing since sliced crispbread and ALMOST rivals the candles in terms of draw. The cafeteria totally rocks – as witnessed by the hoardes of people that were there scarfing down those Swedish goodies and – like EPI and I – hangigkjöt [smoked lamb - literally translates as "hung meat" no I am not joking]. I mean, hangikjöt is our most traditional Nicelandic Christmas food ever and proof positive that IKEA the multinational can integrate seamlessly and even hob-nob with the locals like there’s no tomorrow.
And the best thing? The absolute BEST thing about the IKEA cafeteria? THE SERVICE. I know, I know – those of you who have been with me a while know that I never tire of bitching about Icelandic service which by and large is absolute CRAP. But you know what makes the service SO EXCELLENT in the IKEA cafeteria? The fact that the staff is Asian. Probably Vietnamese. They are super-fast, they are polite, they are friendly, they smile, and when something is amiss [like when they run out of ketchup] they are on it IN A FLASH. Possibly the best service I’ve had in all of Iceland, I kid you not.
Anyway, I’m rambling, must be something about the air in there, or perhaps it’s the intoxicating effects of all that gratuitous spending.
THE WEATHER HAS NOT IMPROVED MUCH
By which I mean it is still windy. It started off bitchin’ cold this morning but gradually temps eased their way up and it’s now 4°C [39F]. [So it has improved - a little.] The sun came up late today at 10.47 and set at 3.45.
{ 27 comments… read them below or add one }
haha, you can also buy Swedish meatballs, frozen in big bags, my son’s choir had them in their rehearsal weekend this fall. My husband said: Hey, cool, IKEA meatballs, the only drawback is the time it takes to assemble them with that little wrench…
The IKEA cafeteria Spicy Meatbealls are to die for!!! It’s been so long since I’ve been in there that I don’t even know if they still do them. Hope so.
Reykjavik’s Ikea canteen must be the best value food in Iceland. I remember having Swedish meatballs with potatoes etc there late last year and the meal was something like £3.
There is nothing wrong IN there. You just happened to be inside the big machine. This kind small machines sell you sandwi(t)ches and other small stuff. IKEA is just a big one – selling big stuff and looking like a building
PS. your purchase list just proves that.
I always end up buying lots of stuff I never knew I needed as well. Stuff we end up getting there: dishwashing brushes (with a suction cup at the end so you can stick it to the sink), table cloths, tea light candles, christmas decorations, food, lights, containers for any sort of thing ever. I can’t go to Ikea without eating in the cafeteria, it’s so cheap and the food is nice for the price. I wish the australian ikea served hangikjot, that would be awesome.
I am jealous. I want the Baltimore IKEA to serve hangigkjöt in the cafeteria.
Perhaps we could have an exchange, and send Iceland some crab cakes?
I have been enjoying your blog, from here in rainy, gray Portland OR. My daughter spent a year in Iceland as an exchange student and lived with a family whom I will not name due to some political considerations. But I took my other two children (this was some years ago) for a week’s visit before Kate came home. I LOVED Iceland and am still completely fascinated by it. If past lives are real, I used to be a Viking! We did a little touring on the south coast and I was just blown away by the history – a cave in a farmer’s backyard with a gothic cross and candle shelves carved into the walls, completely unprotected, and a waterfall to rival Bridalveil Falls in Yosemite, with no fence, few signs, and no tourist kiosks. Oh – and no other people around. My daughter has been back several times and I hope to return too. I wanted to take the writing workshop offered by Bill Holm, but didn’t even find out about that until he died. What a loss.
As for IKEA….we were blessed with IKEA a little over a year ago here in Portland. Yes, there is a wandering aspect to the store and I swear under my breath when it’s crowded and I can’t find my way out. But they are good for basement furniture and art room cabinets and miscellaneous other things I don’t really need, so i try to avoid it too. I did try their meatballs once, in a small cup and they weren’t bad, but my recipe is much better.
I had to laugh when I read this and thought about my own trips to IKEA to get JUST napkins and candles, and walking out with dozens of other trashy things I didn’t know I *needed* (and haven’t used since I got them home.). Here, the big thing at the cafeteria is the breakfast. If you get there before 11am, you have have eggs and some kind of meat-like substance, toast and coffee for 1 dollar. That’s one CANADIAN dollar. Which is pretty cheap. Then again, it’s a pretty awful breakfast, when you actually taste it. And the Anna’s gingersnaps … check out the trans-fat content … they’re yummy, but … (I will admit to being partial to the ABBA fish spread in a tube, tho)
No more blogging about IKEA, I can get that experience here in San Diego, California!!
Honestly, you could probably have named those items in Swedish and I would have recognised them. Oh Ikea…
it’s admirable your self-criticism on “Icelandic service”; It is true asian people are really polite… they are a friendly people. icelandic people are neighbourly too, but in other fields of life…
nice:)
vince
This post is hilarious. And completely reflects my experiences in IKEA.
The one thing I am surprised at is that you say that Icelandic service is crap. When my fiancé and I were there, everyone was so nice and friendly and helpful! Maybe we were just lucky? Or maybe customer service is just even WORSE in Britain (which I think is the most likely reason).
Love your blog, but one sentence from this post bothered me a bit. I will show you which, with a little changes made to the text by me.
But you know what makes the service SO EXCELLENT in the IKEA cafeteria? The fact that the staff is German. Probably Bawarians. They are super-fast, they are polite, they are friendly, they smile, and when something is amiss [like when they run out of ketchup] they are on it IN A FLASH. Possibly the best service I’ve had in all of Iceland, I kid you not.
That pretty good sums up my experience with IKEA in Germany – with nicely put circuitous sentences, picturing the winding path through the shop
As the bad air and the crowds often give me a headache, I usually prefer to cut short, heading directly for the cafeteria and the delicious Swedish groceries – unfortunately, they don’t offer hangikjöt or anything Icelandic here. I am surprised to hear, that they have cafeterias with service in Iceland – in Germany it’s always self-service.
The wages at Reykjavik’s IKEA don’t seem high enough to attract local people to this job. But my impression is, that the quality of Icelandic service – at least towards tourists – is improving and becoming more professional. Maybe, this impression is not representative but I still have hope – unless I send a request by email, which almost always has to be repeated twice or more times until I probably get an answer. Emails from Germany to Iceland seem to get lost somewhere in the Atlantic Ocean quite often.
Thank you everyone! Isn’t it just amazing how much we all have in common?
Joerg – Emails from Germany to Iceland seem to get lost somewhere in the Atlantic Ocean quite often. — oh believe me, emails sent across town in Reykjavík also get lost FAR too often!
Twice I’ve eaten in IKEA, here in Scotland; twice I’ve been sorely disappointed. Surly unhelpful staff; cluttered un-cleared dirty tables;lukewarm food and all relatively expensive considering the size of portion on the plate. Still it’s much that shoppers in any organisation’s store in the UK have long gotten used to. Shame Sweden doesn’t send in mystery shoppers from head office to find just how far short their UK stores fall from their ideal.
I have never done the IKEA experience but hope to for christmas as it is in Dublin which is a 160km trudge from my neck of the woods in Waterford.But luckily I am due to be in Dublin airport which is 5 klicks away from it. Imagine what a nightmare it would be for you Alda if they made a McDonalds we are pulling out annoucement.
“Due to the fall in the Krona blah blah our business model is no longer viable etc etc”
Would you be cheering from the rafters then ha ha
Susan. Check the weather here – to feel better (maybe). But Portland is beautiful town. So you have to prove it’s gray!
http://forums.icelandweatherreport.com/viewtopic.php?p=1229#p1229
PS. After reading comments I’ve started to think “Something wrong with me”. All my attempts to buy anything at IKEA failed. We got only bed there (it was very bad and funny experience) and computer table (really good one – but they discontinued this model).
I haven’t made any comments in a long time, but I just wanted to say again how much I enjoy your blog Alda, and how much I appreciate your writing and humor. Thank you!
I am not a great fan of Ikea, but then I don’t like shopping.
But I’ve had the experience of going into the basement and buying all kinds of stuff I didn’t need, though the candles are great.
You just recounted my own experience with IKEA but I can one-up you. They sell a kind of shadow-box frame there that means I actually have to go there for REASONS OF BUSINESS too! To add insult to injury, there’s one 15 minutes from my home and another one 20 minutes from my home. Be still my beating heart.
Alda, I appreciate your blog.
Your writing ,humor and insight makes me laugh as well as inform me.
I never knew that IKEA served food, so I went to the one in Burbanks Calf.
Sadly, they do not serve smoked lamb.
Had to make do with the meatballs.
I left with my credit cards at home, lest, I run up a huge Xmas bill
Bless, Bless
Thank you, everyone!
I find it so amusing how many of you comment on the light-hearted nature of this post, because seriously, this is what ALL my posts used to be like (or, well, 95% of them). But of course that was before ALL THE EVIL HAPPENED.*
* those of you who read Stieg Larsson in English translation will get the reference.
The weather?! The weather is AMAZING! I can’t believe how dry and calm and crisp it is. We spent the day at the pool in the sunshine.
Am so happy to be back.
Um, I seem to have read the weather report on the wrong day. Yes, it was kinda rubbish yesterday. Sozzles.
Hi Alda! I’ve been reading your blog since i started preparations to my first visit to Iceland, what occurred last July. I fell IN LOVE by your country and people, and i adopted your “Niceland” at once!!!
: Ikea, Stig Larsson….globalization as its ways…thanx so much…Dora, Portugal.
i thougth that this was my link to niceland, but really now we are bonding
LOL, I was just now planning a trip over to Ikea in Toronto. I’ve been avoiding it but I’ve exhausted all my other choices and I’m tired of walking out of places empty handed because of poor selection and horrible service. Almost a guilty pleasure because there’s nothing wrong with the place except the drive and the temptation to buy things I didn’t plan for.
So the layout elsewhere is similar? LOL, those circles take some getting used to. You can pop in and find what you want straight away and then are supposed to walk 1KM around the store just to get out. You learn which doors that say “do not enter” are perfectly good shortcuts.
The cafeteria is the best deal around. $1 for breakfast or $2 to splurge on a fancier one is a hilariously good deal. And the coffee isn’t bad either.