Toronto. I have to confess I was a little nervous to be coming here. This is the city that fostered me while I took those first tentative steps into adulthood. It’s where I experienced tremendous highs and deepest lows in equal measure. It’s where I fell in love for the first time – and fell hard. It’s where I had my heart broken, where I lost my self-esteem, where I realized to my great alarm that I didn’t know who I was. Where I thought I could never have the life I have today. And where I eventually started on that path to discovering that I was wrong.
I’ve only been here for two days, but it feels… strange. Like the city doesn’t fit me. Maybe it never did. Maybe I was so desperate to fit it that I made myself hopelessly unhappy. Maybe.
The people here are amazing, though, those that take the time to chat. So incredibly friendly and personable. But I sense a bit of an emotional vacuum in the cityscape itself. I think I knew it all along. Europe is my home.
Meanwhile, we’ve experienced intense thunderstorms since we got here. I’d forgotten what those were like. I have no idea what the temperature is, butI would guess around 24 Celsius. And humid. The sort of humidity you never get in Iceland. I like it. And dark evenings. Where the darkness hits almost instantly, as opposed to Iceland where it takes hours and hours – if it gets dark at all.